Author: Jefe

“The Land of the Free, The Home of the Brave, is in the Round of Eight” – World Cup announcers.

We did it! I stayed up late after work and I watched it all! (check out the time stamp!) The United States has never advanced to the quarterfinals in the history of the World Cup. EVER! Just watch how many people go football crazy now. For the record, I went nuts before all of ya’ll bandwagoners! By the end of this game Mexico started to get down right nasty. 10 yellow cards in the game, almost all of them in the second half. The Mexican captain, known to be a classy player, intentionally headbutted the U.S.’ Kobe Jones in the throat in the 84th minute and got red carded. Granted, Mexico put up a firece attack and got rogered just a bit on what looked like a bad non-call by the officials on a handball inside the box that would have led to a penalty kick. Still, if the Mexican team honestly thinks it can make two goals on one penalty kick, I say bring everyone back and let them take it. Way to go team! Next up, Germany, legendary for its goalkeepers. I’ve set all out clocks to the locales that The U.S. might play if they continue to advance, and I am officially a football hooligan. I feel the urge to break things and trample people, but I will refrain.

I’ll ask again though, seriously, who wants to trade shirts?

Ahhh summer time is here, and movies are everywhere. Check out the New Reviews.

The Bourne Identity

Starring Matt Damon, Franka Potente, Clive Owen, Chris Cooper, and Brain Cox.

Directed by Doug Liman

Yet another case where you shouldn’t read the book until after you’ve seen the film. This isn’t because the book will ruin the ending of an amazing thriller that you might never have seen coming. In this case, the plot of Robert Ludlum’s best seller is so drastically altered that the two stories bear only a surface resemblance to each other. Matt Damon plays a man plucked from the water in the middle of the Mediteranean, shot twice, and completely without memory of himself or his past. The only clue to his identity is a Swiss Bank account number, surgically implanted under his skin. Here, most of the similarites end. The reason reading the book first is bad in this case is that there, the plot twists were myriad, rivaling The Usual Suspects or The Crying Game (and not just that one, um, big one.) Liman has chosen to replace plot here with style, and not particualrly effectively. The action is acceptable but not top notch, with too many shaky camera angles limiting the balletic action of some of the fight scnes, though not the one in Bourne’s Paris apartment, which was great. The villian is flat and uninteresting, the chase seems obvious at every turn. Franka Potente’s dedication to the hero seems based simply on attraction rather than emotion, Chris Cooper and Brian Cox chase Bourne for no other cause than to save their own asses, and ultimately, Bourne himself discovers little of who he really is, only that it’s not what he wants to be, like some psychotic and violent mid-life crisis gone awry. The only emotional depth added to his character at all is done so by someone else, a secret agent known as the Professor, played with interesting emotional depth in his only speaking scene by Clive Owen, who seems to play only parts where the character has no name (he was The Driver in the BMW films series last year, all of which had more interesting plot twists than this film. They were also under 10 minutes each in length). When all is said and done, this is just another soon to be forgotten summer action flick. 2 cell phones.

Unfaithful

Starring Diane Lane, Richard Gere, Olivier Martinez, Chad Lowe, and dominic Chianese

Directed by Adrian Lynne.

A sordid little drama of love, lust, betrayal, murder, sexy french guys with alluring accents, lots of rain, lots of doubt, lots of suspicion. Directed by Adrain Lynne of the famed Red Shoe Diaries, this film had the potential to turn into late Night HBO soft core materail. Thankfully, it does not. It is quite sensually charged, but as they say, tasteful. At least, as tasteful as a quickie in a New York coffee house bathroom can be. Mr. Lynne in fact makes great use of the perfect soft white skin of his leading lady. Lane never really needs to be naked to give us a sexually charged performance that is simply some of her best work. Her confusion and fear while making love to a man she should not are contrasted with moments of wanton abandon from her, and they are equally alluring and saddening. The shot of her stomach, bare and shaking as her lover lightly blows on her reveal an emotinal depth through physical acting that stays with the viewer (and not just men) thorughout the film. Gere’s soft and understated performance balances Lane’s fiery ups and sodden emotional downs interestingly as his frustration gets the better of him and his wife slips away. The couple’s ultimate dedication to each other, or at least to the idea that they started out with of their lives, is quite moving. Good performances by supporting cast round out a suprisingly subtle yet erotic film nicely. 4 cell phones

The Sum of all Fears

Starring Ben Affleck, Morgan Freeman, Liev Schrieber, James Cromwell and Bridget Moynahan

The sum total here is extremely disappointing. Tom Clancy’s novel, heavily adapted to fit in Ben affleck as a younger Jack Ryan (following in the footsteps of Harrison Ford is no laughing matter) simply never adds up. There is not one single plot twist in this espionage/terrorist thriller that isn’t telegraphed half an hour ahead of time. The film makers are cheaply, in my opinion, playing on new American fears and concerns about terrorist activity, and giving us a story where we can win against them simply because its what we all want so desperately to do. The reinvention of Ryan as a younger man, and the story about he and his wife’s early romantic stages provides an interesting thread only if you’ve seen and enjoyed the other Jack Ryan films, and in the end, it simply reminds you how much better they were than this one. 1 cell phone, don’t bother folks.

I used to openly make fun of soccer. I played it as a child, but the fanaticism of the international fan has been lost on me for most of my life. Those people are out of control.

Or so I thought.

It’s World Cup Time and I am addicted. Hooked. I simply can’t get enough. I watch every match I can. I record the US games at 6:45 in the morning. I watched Brazil play in the middle of the night. Whatever strange little neuron makes people go crazy for running around chasing a white ball for an hour and a half and trying desperately to bash things with your head has fired in my brain. I am a Football fan. I know the lingo even.

Who wants to trade shirts?

(Also, we have a new winner, check her out)

My, what a great start to our weekend Summerbash! Last night, after much planning and preparation, the party for Kevin’s 33rd year of walking around began. The festivites began slowly, as we were joined first by Dave, then later Allison and Shaun. Other guests arrived, including the margarita machine, Mark and Matt, and (very very much ) later Erica and Amanda. There was sing along (like I don’t get enough of that) there was art making, there was fire. There was a lot of imbibing of the sweet nectar. There was frivolity, there was hilarity, there was fun. Now, I am gonna go make breakfast and wake everyone up. Later, there will be tubing. LOOK OUT! No really, look out, tubes can be dangerous.

Absence makes the heart grow fonder. Truer words were never spoken. Zuzia’s back, and I missed her a lot more than I thought I did. She cut her hair while she was gone, she looks great, I am acting like a complete dork but don’t care. It’s really wonderful to see her.

Plus, she brought me some liquor. Partygoers will all get a sample of the finest Polish Vodka in the world.

Welcome back, Zuzia!

My friend Zuzia was born in Poland. She and her sister and parents moved to Chicago when she was about 2, and she has lived in America all her life, but she has a very strong connection to Poland and her remaining family there. She speaks fluent Polish and is visiting right now on a three week trip. I miss her a lot and want her to come back soon, but right now I want to share something she wrote to me with all of you. It’s about a place in Poland she has always wanted to visit, and it’s about a rather extraordinary man whom I have not met, but would like to. So, here’s the first guest writer ever at Cloudwrangler, Zuzia Jarzebska.

“Auschwitz is really surreal.

My grandfather was a prisoner there in 1943. He was once given an assignment to paint a picture on a wall in one of the barracks. After the war (he actually escaped from the camp in 1944, but thats another story…) he went back to the barrack, found his picture and signed it with his name and the number he had tattooed on him. The picture is in barrack #8, which is closed because the museum doesn’t use that building for anything. But my grandfather called ahead to the museum director (who he is buddies with) and arranged for them to open barrack #8 just for us. So today I saw a painting my grandfather painted as a prisoner 59 years ago. ”

Star Wars Episode II: Attack of the Clones

Starring Hayden Christiansen, Natalie Portman, Ewan McGregor, Frank Oz and Samuel L. Jackson

Directed by George Lucas.

The second installment in the overall Star Wars saga is finally here, and guess what? It’s a movie, not a film. Too many were expecting the latter and are writing off this flick as a disappointment. Too many feel it will never live up to the original trilogy, and they are right. Everyone needs to take a deep breath, and try to remember that these ARE KIDS MOVIES! There are laser swords and aliens in them fer Pete’s sake. So, bear with George and rememebr he’s trying to do the near impossible, which is create a fully formed myth in the modern world.

All that said, this movie scores well in lots of areas. George Lucas had help writing the screenplay this time, and it shows in the dialogue particularly. As we meet the older but not yet quite grown up Anakin Skywalker, we’re confronted with an actor (Christiansen) trying to play a character so deep in scope and steeped in pop culture reverance it would be difficult for anyone to live up to. Is he Darth vader? No, not yet, and the young actor may not have the chops to pull this off completley. More than anyone else, his dialogue seems stunted and forced. His face is a bit too blank as we watch him fall in love all over again with Padme Amidala, whom Portman has portrayed here with a deep grace that belies her own youth. I buy her being in love with him and afraid of him at the same time, all of which should lead to his eventual downfall. Of that fall we see only hints, and the real story may be yet to come for him. This movie does set up the political backdrop of war (combined with a thinly veiled denouncement of terrorism in the opening scene) and provides us with what makes for a summer movie blockbuster that everyone can love: Jedi Knights. They ARE EVERYWHERE, and they kick some butt. The climactic battle scenes are vivid and detailed, with great effects that we all expect from Lucas. Sam Jackson’s role is cool as ice (though it could have been fleshed out a bit more) McGregor’s Obi-wan is interesting as a lone hero rather than a teacher to Anakin, which may impart some of the blame for things to come in his direction. Speaking of blame, thank the maker for the limited appeances of Jar Jar Binks, and that he is the scapegoat of all scapegoats here. Finally, get ready for Yoda to steal the show. He is the Jedi Master folks, and you’ll never forget it after this.

Ok, so did you follow all that? Great effects, lots of fun action adventure, a somewhat stunted love story that’s only believable from one side, and don’t make too much over it. Remember summer movies are about fun! After all, it’s not Empires Strikes Back, people. 3 cell phones.