Often, when watching sports, I am astounded by the human ability to TALK FOREVER ABOUT THE BLATANTLY OBVIOUS! Today, it happened again. I am refering, of course, to sports announcers never ending need to inform us of the team of the moments “Keys to Victory”. This happens most often on big games, though it seems to pop up more and more every year. “So, Bob, what do the Browns need to do today to win this football game?” “Well Stan, they need to score points. They also need to stop their opponent from scoring points. Now, bear with me because I know this gets tough to follow and you may need a slide rule to figure out my premise here, but essentially, the Browns need to score MORE points than the OTHER TEAM to win.”

It happend tonight, as Zuzia, Kevin, Sarah, and I were watching the NCAA Women’s Championship game which UConn won handily, finishing off an unbeaten season. (Congrats ladies!). Just before the game, one announcer asked the other what Oklahoma needed to beat Uconn. Seriously, I would have given my right arm for the announcer to say something original.

“Well, Dan, I think what the Sooners really need to be victorious here tonight is just a pinch of Oregano. Not too much, you don’t want to overpower your sauce or your transition defense. Just a pinch will do.”